‘Inside job’- the end of my blissful ignorance

For years I have lived happily in ignorance of the upheaval that is taking place all around me.  Amidst all the chaos of wars being fought for no apparent reason other than greed and provocation, administrators in power trying to dictate or discriminate against people for their faith or lack thereof, recessions, inflations, bubbles, I was an island just staying happily afloat in deliberate naiveté.  My only concerns related to taking care of my family, running my business, taking art lessons and going to galleries and museums wherever I may be.   I didn’t read the newspapers or listen to the news, my only exception was listening every once in a while to my brother’s show, The Young Turks, on the internet but that was for pure entertainment.  The reason for my self-imposed illiteracy was because I felt powerless and insignificant in face of all that was happening in the world; although this was my lifelong belief, the ’second Bush’ era, I believe, cemented the fact of an individual’s inconsequentiality.  I only had one vote and that was the extent of my power, the current administration could do whatever pleased them or the interests they were supporting without being held accountable.  The world would keep on turning, young people dying for no logical, humane reasons, some people going bankrupt while others’ endowments swelled to incomprehensible proportions whether I took notice or not…

I was living in Turkey for the past twenty years up until a year ago where most of everyone’s favorite pastime had to do with discussing either politics or football (soccer) neither of which I am even remotely interested in.  “What is going to happen to this country” was the most frequent question that was on everyone’s lips and opening salvo for any conversation.  The current politics always involved some kind of nauseating precept relating in some way to religion since the party in power is what is currently being dubbed as favoring ‘mild Islam’ in a secular state that is more than 90% Muslim.  To the horror of most of the people I know, Turkey’s current president and prime minister’s wives are what we call ‘covered’ - they wear the ‘turban,’ the biggest political statement in Turkey these days.  I can hear from everyone around me of the good old days back in the 50’s and 60’s when the only women who wore headscarves were the elderly relatives in people’s families.  For years, there I was, a woman who grew up and was educated in the United States, trying to raise two boys to be world citizens, aware of their own heritage and national identity while attempting to come to terms with a country that was supposed to be my motherland in which I felt more an outsider every day.

Keeping myself news-free wasn’t an easy task either when my husband’s favorite pastime was listening to the news and all the talk shows and panels discussing the current economy and the political scene; the Turkish nightly news is anything but local or whimsical.   Unfortunately, thanks to my husband, we went to see the movie, ‘Inside Job’ on Saturday and it is the end of my innocence, I am now much more knowledgeable about the current economic mess we are in and started to recognize the protagonists on television where they seem to appear every other second.  So, now I know about deregulation and risky mortgages and derivatives, and I recognized the former CEO of Countrywide Insurance, Angelo Mozilo when Cenk mentioned him Tuesday night on Countdown, I also know that there is no end in sight… and what has that gotten me in return… is my family’s or my own life more enriched in any way because of this uncalled for knowledge?  Am I a better person or one that is more beneficial to the world at large due to this bit of wisdom?  

When the lights went on in the theater after viewing 'Inside Job', I couldn’t help but agree with the sentiment of the gentleman who was sitting one row behind me … “I want to go throw myself under a bus now…” 

Instead I want to throw this question out into the world, hoping to get some kind of an intelligent alternative, after all that I have seen and learned, how can anyone blame me for wanting to retreat to the beautiful world of art where the contemporary works challenge and exhilarate my intellect and all that is left of the past rulers like the Medici from the time of the Renaissance are beautiful art effects that have made our world more refined.  I only wish that the current political and financial ‘powers’ would leave something more than this desolate landscape for future generations to study. 

 www.sonyclassics.com/insidejob/ 

Nothing Gold Can Stay

Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower,
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief
So dawn goes down to day,
Nothing gold can stay.
                                
              -  Robert Frost (1923)

A sense of Self Through Art - Part 2

My first official blog-post that I sent out to all my friends and acquaintances, back in June 10th 2010, began with the story of how I have been trying to' find a sense of self through art'...  I think I will follow this concept and report my findings here from now on...

I have spent the last thirty years of my life engaged in many different aspects of art, from studying painting, drawing and Turkish decorative arts to exploring the art world through art history classes, museum and gallery visits, following the print-media, websites and literature, even taking part in group illumination exhibits.  It wouldn't be a gross exaggeration to say that Art has been my salvation, anchor, safe haven throughout life's challenges and quandaries.  

All the while, I have been immersing myself in the art world, I also have been searching for a deeper understanding of what was, is and why.  To garner a greater knowledge and mastery over the arts, I enrolled in an art history class this semester - 15th century Italian Renaissance.  The biggest surprise turned out to be the realization of how there are so many unknowns.  That particular time period, I will have to get to at a later post, I think. 


I used to think that there was a wealth of information, facts that historians and artists knew about the who, what, where, when, how and WHY...of most works of art.  It seemed like some people were 'in the know' about these things and the rest of us were either trying to understand or pretend. The biggest news flash for me turned out to be that we are all in the same boat of trying to analyze and understand what came before us and those 'people in the know' just have been studying for longer, have more insight and indepth information than the rest of us, but still are not in possession of all the facts.  This bit of wisdom actually has given me renewed resolve to become a true connoisseur of the arts and interpret it as best I can.    

At this point I must admit a major deficiency in my font of knowledge - my comprehension of modern art seems to be deficient.  As much as I love to learn and talk about art, I can't seem to make any kind of sense when it comes to communicating about anything past the post-impressionists.  This is partly the reason why I went back to see the 'Matisse:  Radical Invention, 1913-1917' exhibit at Moma, one more time, before it closes tomorrow. 


My son and I had already visited the Matisse exhibit in August and I was disappointed in myself for not being able to arouse any kind of interest in him for the works on display, which are some of Matisse's most powerful and enigmatic.  Even though I enjoyed the guided tour, I was not satisfied with the information the docent provided since it mostly felt like a visual analysis.  I left the museum, feeling I had seen some of the greatest works of art but not having added any new facts to what I already knew and even worse - not being able to answer my son's questions about what was so fascinating.  So, I rushed back, literally, yesterday morning, with hopes of finding the answers I was looking for.  Unfortunately the audio-guide the museum provided  wasn't any more enlightening than the docent was.  A very detailed and interesting visual analysis but nothing ground breaking.  But I was thrilled with being able to savor the wonderful paintings that Matisse himself considered so significant in his career.  What was actually most fascinating was the process each painting went through and the amount of work it entailed before it was actually considered 'finished'.  


What most people don't realize is the significance of hard work that goes into producing art, more than the talent.  This exhibit actually concentrated on the details of the manufacturing and the different stages of each painting and sculpture from this period.  Seeing the X-ray images of the sketches and the paintings underneath the final product was akin to visiting Matisse's studio as the works progressed.  Observing each work closely left me with awe of how his mind worked and still wondering how he thought to do what he did.  


I finally came to the conclusion that these works were not ideas that were thought up and just put on canvas but were evolved entities that came into being as the artist dug them out of his subconscious.  These were built up and changed over time and maybe didn't need to have specific discernible explanations.  They should be experienced and appreciated without asking the typical questions of what or why.  The exhibit will be on view at the Art Institute of Chicago from March 20 through June 20 2010.  I know that I would definitely go back to see it again, if I ever got to Chicago during those dates.  

Please leave your Assumptions, Prejudices and Expectations at the Door...

Come in with an Open Heart and an Open Mind.  Only then could you be truly aware of the worth of your own existence and the awe of your surroundings.
And now... immerse yourself in the moment...